Rule of Love

If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth. For ye are dead, and your life is hid with Christ in God. When Christ, who is our life, shall appear, then shall ye also appear with him in glory. Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; fornication, uncleanness, inordinate affection, evil concupiscence, and covetousness, which is idolatry: For which things' sake the wrath of God cometh on the children of disobedience: In the which ye also walked some time, when ye lived in them. But now ye also put off all these; anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy communication out of your mouth. Lie not one to another, seeing that ye have put off the old man with his deeds; And have put on the new man, which is renewed in knowledge after the image of him that created him: Where there is neither Greek nor Jew, circumcision nor uncircumcision, Barbarian, Scythian, bond nor free: but Christ is all, and in all. Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering; Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye. And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness. And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to the which also ye are called in one body; and be ye thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them. Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged. Servants, obey in all things your masters according to the flesh; not with eyeservice, as menpleasers; but in singleness of heart, fearing God: And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men; Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ. But he that doeth wrong shall receive for the wrong which he hath done: and there is no respect of persons. (Colossians 3:1-25 KJV)

Masters, give unto your servants that which is just and equal; knowing that ye also have a Master in heaven. Continue in prayer, and watch in the same with thanksgiving; Withal praying also for us, that God would open unto us a door of utterance, to speak the mystery of Christ, for which I am also in bonds: That I may make it manifest, as I ought to speak. Walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time. Let your speech be alway with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man. (Colossians 4:1-6 KJV)

In this chapter Paul has drawn the outline of the new self that each Christian is to put on. It is a self ruled by the love of Jesus (see Col 3:14), characterized by forgiveness, harmony, peace and thanksgiving. Paul's overarching rule of life is that every word and every deed be done in the name of Jesus (see Col 3:17). Following such a rule affects our outlook on life. We begin to wake each morning with the sense that we are serving Jesus himself. It is this rule of love that Clement of Rome (c. 40-c. 97), a first-century contemporary of the apostles, describes.

Who can describe the [blessed] bond of the love of God? What man is able to tell the excellence of its beauty, as it ought to be told? The height to which love exalts is unspeakable. Love unites us to God. Lover covers a multitude of sins. Love beareth all things, is long-suffering in all things. There is nothing base, nothing arrogant in love. Love admits of no schisms: love gives rise to no seditions; love does all things in harmony.

The rule of love is to be applied, Paul implies, in the stewardship of all our relationships, both outside the family - in public and in work life (see Col 3:22-4:1; Eph 6:5-9) - and within the family (see Col 3:18-21; Eph 5:22-6:4).
Families exemplify harmony when people have a goal of submission to one another (Eph 5:21): wives esteem and honor their husbands; husbands cherish and value their wives and work to meet their needs; children are cooperative and teachable; parents discipline with gentle love - encouraging their children toward growth in health, wisdom and maturity. Quaker author, philosopher and theologian D. Elton Trueblood (1900-1994) applies the rule of love to relationships within the family. He explains that the family is the custodian of the image of the Triune relationship revealed to us in Jesus Christ, who is the only true example of life's highest ideal.

[The family] is the one institution in which it is possible to say 'we' without any loss of individuality. It is each for all and all for each, as is never the case in a secular society and seldom in a religious society. To say 'we' and to mean it, is a very great spiritual achievement for the nominative plural is the noblest of the personal pronouns. A family in which each does what he can, each receives what he needs, wholly without financial calculation of earning or merit, represents the highest known ideal, our only true approximation to the Kingdom of God, yet countless families, made up of fallible persons, demonstrate this ideal in great measure every day of their lives.

But Paul isn't finished. In his further instructions, he says that putting on Christ means that Christians are to be people of prayer, giving thanks (see Col 4:2). Only with prayer are harmonious relationships possible.